How many dyslexic lightbulbs does it take to change a person?

Lately my six-year old daughter has starting telling jokes, mostly knock-knock jokes.  Of course, she doesn’t really grasp all the aesthetic nuances of the form.  A typical joke:

Knock-knock
Who’s there?
Gabriel!
Gabriel who?
I’m a dinosaur and I’m going to eat you!

That got me thinking about joke forms, like knock-knock jokes, guy walks into a bar jokes, lightbulb jokes, what do you get when you cross jokes, and so forth.

My own favorite knock-knock joke? Maybe this one, which I learned on one of the Prairie Home Companion Joke Shows.

Knock-knock.
Who’s there?
Sam and Janet.
Sam and Janet who?
Sam and Janet evening [Some Enchanted Evening]

More likely it’s the old interrupting cow, but then I have always had a weakness for things like this, that play with the form itself.  In case some of you haven’t heard it.

Knock-knock.
Who’s there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrup–
MOO!

Now go amuse your favorite seven-year old.

But if you ask me, knock-knock jokes have nothing on lightbulb jokes. I’ve been collecting these since I was in college, and there seems to be an inexhaustible supply.  Here are some of my favorites.

  1. How many magicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
    Depends. Into what?
  2. How many psychoanalysts does it take to change a lightbulb?
    One, but the lightbulb has to really want to change.
  3. How many college football players does it take to change a lightbulb?
    The whole team! And they get course credit!
  4. How many narcissists does it take to change a lightbulb?
    Just one. She holds the bulb still as the world revolves around her.
  5. How many  surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?
    Two. One to hold the giraffe, and one to put the clocks in the bathtub.
  6. How many sentimentalists does it take to change a lightbulb?
    Change it?!? My first girlfriend gave me that lightbulb!
  7. How many Irishmen does it take to change a lightbulb?
    Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to drink until the room spins.
  8. How many politically correct people  does it take to change a lightbulb?
    That’s not funny.
  9. How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
    Ten. One to change it, and nine to form a support group for Survivors of Darkness.
  10. How many boring people does it take to change a lightbulb?
    One.
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2 Responses to How many dyslexic lightbulbs does it take to change a person?

  1. kayak woman says:

    When my older daughter was 3-1/2 or so, I told her the old orange/banana knock-knock joke:

    knock knock
    who’s there
    banana
    banana who
    knock knock
    who’s there
    banana
    banana who
    knock knock
    who’s there
    orange
    orange who
    orange you glad I didn’t say banana again?

    She loved it but she *totally* didn’t get it. She went on forever with stuff like “Orange you glad I didn’t say chair again?” (and any other inanimate objects she could come up with).

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